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Who's your baby's daddy?

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  • Seanpcola

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    Just got this in an email"



    A little humor for you. I have no words for most of this stuff.



    Who's Your Baby’s Daddy?



    The following are all replies that Detroit women have written on Child Support Agency Forms in the section for listing 'Father's Details,' or putting it another way...Who's your baby's Daddy?

    These are genuine excerpts from the forms. Be sure to check out #11, it takes 1st prize and #3 is runner up.



    1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, Makeeshia was fathered by Maclearndon McKinley I am unsure as to the identity of the father of Marlinda, but I believe that she was conceived on the same night.



    2. I am unsure, as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps.





    3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived at a party at 3600 East Grand Boulevard where I had sex with a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the father, can you please send me his phone number? Thanks...





    4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it replaced.





    5. I have never had sex with a man. I am still a Virginian. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was ejaculate and that he is the Saver risen again.





    6. I cannot tell you the name of Alleshia's dad as he informs me that to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for the economy I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country.. Please advise.



    7. I do not know who the father of my child was as they all look the same to me.



    8. Tyrone Hairston is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him, can you axe him what he did with my AC/DC CDs? Child B who was also borned at the same time..... Well, I don't have clue..



    9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Disney World. Maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.



    10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If I had stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 8956 Miller Ave , mine might have remained unfertilized.



    11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all, like when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart. (This made number #1).





    THESE PEOPLE VOTE AND ARE THE FUTURE OF THIS COUNTRY
     

    HughJoergan

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    Everyone get back to work! The freeloaders are depending on us!!!

    And would the last American to leave Detroit, please remember to take the Flag.....
     
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    Stanley13

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    (reference #6) I use that secret agent line all the time. After all what chick's gonna argue with an assault weapon pointed at them???
     
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    Seanpcola

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    My former step-brother and I used to use each others names. One day I got a summons to appear in court and to take a Paternity test. When I got all the details I found out it was not only me but another guy I knew got summoned because the mom had been with both of "us" that evening. I didn't even recognize the woman's name (not that I would have remembered it anyway :D). To make matters worse the kid was around 7 YO so there was quite an overdue CS bill to be paid. When I showed up I saw the girl and she saw me and we both agreed that we had never seen each other before in our lives (again, I couldn't say 100% :D). Further research turned up it was my step-bro who was the "donor". He got nailed. Spent years paying and catching up but it turned out great in the long run. They took to each other and the son moved in with him at 13 YO. They're now close and the kid is 31 YO.
     

    Ben Ghazi

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    not only me but another guy I knew got summoned because the mom had been with both of "us" that evening. I didn't even recognize the woman's name .

    UAHO ;]
    I used a different last name that sounds very similar and still do on almost everything , must have worked back when I wuz makin house calls but thous days are way far gone and I am so happy they are.
    Black girl once told me " just cause it looks good don't mean it is good "
    CDC: 110,197,000 venereal infections in U.S.
    Nation creating new STIs faster than new jobs or college grads
     
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